Just Another Day

So...My nutritionist told me I needed to eat certain things at certain times during the day. To clarify, I must eat five to six "mini" meals everyday. Each meal must consist of a certain amount of protein, fat, and carbohydrate. She says it will help my metabolism stabilize and also keep my energy up throughout the day. She even says it will help with any reflux or digestive problems I might have - the benefits of not putting too much food on your stomach at any given time. This is really hard for me to swallow.

Five to six meals every day? Really? I mean, I know she calls them "mini" - but that still involves me eating five to six times a day. That's at the very least 180 minutes of everyday spent eating food. That doesn't even include the time used to plan and prep my miniature forms of sustenance. So, at the very least I'm looking at 300 - 400 minutes a day being around or thinking about food.

I thought facing my eating disorder was about getting away from the nasty habit of overthinking food. But, now I find myself thinking about it even more...and then, feeling bad that I'm probably still not thinking about it enough to fulfill my obligatory 300 - 400 daily minutes.

Where's the line between health-conscious and obsessiveness? Because I want to be healthy. I want to fuel my body appropriately. I'm just so tired of thinking about it all...and it's so easy to fall back into the comforting arms of an old habit that does the thinking for you.